What Causes PAS?

One of the saddest consequences of divorce, especially high-conflict divorce, is that children often feel torn between the two parents that they love when one parent seeks to exact revenge on the other parent by brainwashing children through a form of child abuse known as parental alienation. Some children are more vulnerable than others to this abuse. When these vulnerable children perceive that they must chose between parents and reject a parent they love, parent alienation results.

PAS was first described in the 1980's by psychiatrist Richard A. Gardner, M.D. Dr. Gardner realized that there were similar and recurring behaviors among 90 percent of children in high-conflict, court involved, drawn out divorce cases. Since these behaviors frequently appeared together on a regular basis, he called it a syndrome. More accurately, they are frequently occurring behaviors on a continuum.

Twenty years later we know more than we did when Gardner first described it. The scientific literature is far more widespread now but PAS has still not received the research attention it needs, when compared to the huge numbers of new children and families affected each year.

We do know that it is often the healthier parent that children reject as part of PAS. The child is not only denied his or her relationship with a healthier parent, but all the experiences of being with that parent. The courts sometimes fail miserably to provide help to PAS families. Sometimes lawyers, judges, and even mental health professionals are unknowing participants.

Extended families also and unfortunately become involved, forming coalitions, thus making it harder for an alienated child to "cross the line" of programmed loyalty from the less healthy parent. These coalitions have the quality of absurdity and craziness that have been compared to the irrational qualities of  fear and loathing  in cultural and racial hatred.

There is extensive acceptance in  mental health communities that parental alienation not only exists, but is child abuse. There is effort underway to have it included in the 2010 DSM-IV  (Manual of Mental Disorders). Within the legal community, PAS has met the Frye standard for evidentiary reliability in many courtrooms. Some advocacy groups attempt to make it controversial, but when it happens to you or to someone you love, it's not controversial. It's painfully devastating. If this is your situation, knowing that there is a name for what you are going through and that you are not alone, may provide you with some comfort.

My hope  is that this web site can help you to recognize signs of attempted parental alienation and Parental Alienation Syndrome and to give you some direction and understanding  if it is happening to you or someone you love. Forewarned is forearmed and increased awareness can help to stop it.  It is not intended to replace face-to-face counseling, psychotherapy, or medical treatment. For more information, click on any of the links.